By Christine Mirembe
The first fruit of the womb, a leader by default. All eyes glare upon thee, watching your every move diligently. In our society, first-born children are normally referred to as “deputy parents,” a title sweet to the ears yet sour to the bearer. From a young age, they are expected to set an example, be responsible and pave the way for their siblings.
While being a first born is a privilege, it comes with its fair share of challenges including loss of a childhood, the burden of responsibility, pressure to be perfect, and societal expectations among others. Within the realm of societal expectations lies the thief of their joy as they toil to present the perfect image that their families and communities want to behold. They are afraid to make mistakes and so they lose out on a normal childhood. They have to take care of their younger siblings, oversee household chores and run errands. While these are beneficial and important in their upbringing, they are also overwhelming and stressful, especially when not regulated by adults around.
In most African homes however, when people are asked to regulate how much responsibility to give to a child, they think the children are being lazy. The pressure to be perfect fronts every decision they are about to make. It has to be spotless since those after them are watching and could pick a leaf. Not many really make an effort to check up on them.
But the first born children needed to be treated as children, loved with abandon, forgiven for mistakes made, allowed to make their decisions with guidance and be cared for.
